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Ziggy & Me
Ziggy is my best friend and I love her unconditionally, and she loves me also. We like to recreate movies we watch together on TV. A few of our favorites are Gone With The Wind, Magnum Force and The Wizard of Oz (which is her favorite).

The other day, we recreated the scene from Rocky I where Rocky wins the fight and instead of yelling Adrian, I yelled ZIGGY, ZIGGY! And she came running meowing all the way down the steps from upstairs jumping into my arms. It knocked me off balance. I fell down and hit my head on the coffee table knocking me unconscience.

While I was out, Ziggy dialed 911 and the paramedics came. They had to break the front door down because Ziggy fainted from the shock of seeing me lying there unconscious. After working several minutes on me, they brought Ziggy to. We embraced and had dinner by candlelight with Italian music playing in the background and then watched a movie, Rocky II.

I opened my eyes feeling a bit woozy and seeing a few birdies flying about my head. I realized that Ziggy calling 911, the paramedics coming over, the dinner and the movie was nothing more than a dream while I was unconscious.

I looked everywhere for Ziggy. She was nowhere to be found. I started getting very worried after about 2 hours had passed. Suddenly, there was a knock at the door. It was Buster, Ziggys friend who is a little Chiquaqua. She barked to me to come get Ziggy because they were drinking beer and she got really drunk and fell down.

Just as I was getting ready to run out the door to help my friend, I felt someone slapping me to come to. It was Ziggy! She was slapping me with her paw and gave me mouth to mouth a few times. YUK! That's why those hairballs were in my mouth. It was all a dream. I hate when that happens!

Anyway, after I took some aspirin for my headache, I put some Italian music on and fixed dinner. Then we watched a movie. I think it was.... 'A Beautiful Mind'.

_______________________________________________

It was a very hot day in the Summer of '68 and many people passing each other downtown were extremely and unusually irritable. Some cars in the street were over heated and the traffic was unbearable.

Two strangers who were standing on the corner and getting ready to cross the street started screaming at each other and calling each other terrible names when all of sudden, it broke out into a fight. Several of the bystanders tried in vain to break it up but to no avail. The strangers rolled out into the street and both were hit by a bus.

They were rushed to City Hospital with minor injuries which were treated in the emergency room and released. They introduced themselves to each other and decided to go have a beer.

After about the 4th or 5th beer, the one fellow invited the other to his house for dinner and meet the wife. They called a cab and off they went.

"Honey," said this husband to his wife, "I invited a friend home for supper."

"What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I didn't go shopping, all the dishes are dirty, and I don't feel like cooking a fancy meal!"

"I know all that." replied the nonchalant husband.

"Then why on Earth did you invite a friend for supper?!?" said the infuriated wife.

"Because the poor guy's thinking about getting married."

Then his wife asked, "Well, how about a nice steak, mashed potatoes, corn and an apple pie for dessert?"

And the husband replied, "No thanks. We're too tired. Let's just eat at home."

_________________________________________

Crazy Farmer Bledsoe

It was a windy day in South Gizzards, a small municipality outside Chicken Liver, North Dakota. It was so windy, the doors on the barn that had been flapping in the wind all night had fallen off their hinges because Hagger Bledsoe, the farmer and owner of one of the largest farms around that area, didn't secure them the night before.


Some of the animals that were in the barn that windy night all got loose. One chicken had crossed the road, rolled in the mud and crossed back again because she was a dirty double crosser. The cow was right behind her and crossed the road because she wanted to go to the mooooovies! Several animals stayed behind because the pig was sick. They treated him with oinkment. The horse was sick too so they gave him cough stirrup. Some of the other pigs were sitting around the radio listening to Swine Lake. Because the storm was pretty bad, all the animals that got out went back home. The farm bull slept though the whole night because he was a bulldozer. The cows Bledsoe Hagger owned must have had a great sense of humor because he reffered to them as a laughing stock.

In any case, at 5AM, the farmer Hagger Bledsoe got up to go to work on the farm. As he stepped into the kitchen, he noticed his barn door was open. His wife Flippy told him to zip it up and off he went to milk the cows. The farmer started milking his cow Georgette. He was just starting to get a good rhythm going when a bug flew into the barn and started circling his head. Suddenly, the bug flew into the cow's ear. The farmer didn't think much about it, until the bug squirted out into his bucket. It went in one ear and out the udder.

Later that day at the dinner table, Hagger asked Flippy as he was reaching for the cheese, "What do you call cheese that isn't yours?"

She said she didn't know and he replied, "Nacho cheese".

"Oh yea!" She said. "What does corn say when it's picked?"

"Ouch! My ears!" he replied.

Then she hit him in the head with a pot and they lived happily ever after! And so did the animals.

___________________________________

Just A Closer Walk With Ziggy

Yesterday morning, I got up to find that the weather was surprisingly cool. This was a welcomed relief from the heat so I grabbed a cup of coffee and took Ziggy for a walk. Because the weather was in the upper 90's for a long time, I wouldn't allow her to go outdoors.

As we made the first turn to begin our walk around the block, I saw, out of the corner of my eye, a cute little dog named Ginger. Ziggy and I stopped for a moment to speak to her and ended up inviting her to Ziggy's 16th birthday party coming up in November.

Saying goodbye and stepping off to the right, there was this open man hole in the street and I fell in. Down and down I fell before falling into 5 feet of water. There was no way of getting back up. I saw Ziggy and Ginger with their little heads looking over the side. There were 2 barks from Ginger and 3 meows from Ziggy, but I couldn't make out what they were trying to say because of the tremendous rush of water coming in.

I started screaming, "HELP! HELP! I'VE FALLEN AND I CAN"T GET UP! SOMEBODY! HELP ME!"

The time that went by seemed like hours when all of a sudden, a rope dropped down 5 inches above my head. Grabbing on to the rope, I began my ascent until I reached the top. As I peered over the edge of the man hole, there was Ziggy, Ginger, and 17 other cats and dogs from the neighborhood with the rope in their teeth pulling and pulling until I was completely on the street. I was like a fish out of water or I should say, a beached whale.


As I stood up, they all started applauding their little paws in jubilation. Some were crying; some were laughing; some were patting each other on the back. Little Bubba, a Bulldog, who was the anchor in pulling me up, came over and gruffed if I was alright. In any case, I was so grateful, that after I replaced the lid on the manhole so no one else would fall in, I invited everyone over to the house for biscotti and milk. After all, this is the Italian section of town.

Just as Ziggy and I were getting ready to say goodbye to everyone, the phone rang and it was The Disney Company. They were interested in our story but because Ziggy wouldn't get to play herself in the movie, we had to turn down the offer.

The birthday party in November for Ziggy will be a little bit larger than expected because we not only made few new friends that day, but originally, no dogs were invited. But now, and under the circumstances, it will be the best birthday party ever for the Ziggs! :)

ZIGGY




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