this day, Thursday, so unusual from the rest? It's
like climbing a hill. You're almost to the top, but
not there yet. If you stop for a break, you're not
going to slide back down to Monday. So, go ahead and
take a break and I hope you enjoy this story I wrote
||Big Dill Pickle and the County Fair
Pickle had the record for eating the most foot long
submarine sandwiches in Harrietsville, North Carolina
each year at the County Fair held in July. He held
that record for twenty years. Each time he won,
they gave him a 6-inch Gold Medallion of a submarine
sandwich on a chain, which he wore around his neck
never leave his house without wearing those twenty
Gold Medallions he won each year. The Gold Medallions
became so heavy though, he walked bent over and
he soon needed a cane just to walk around to hold
Fair record was eating 6 foot-long submarine sandwiches
in 5 minutes. There was no one around who could
beat him because he would take the entire sandwich
and just shove the whole thing in his mouth.
sandwiches were mayonnaise, mustard, horseradish,
pickles, tomatoes, ham, beef, baloney, headcheese,
American cheese and lettuce. It was amazing to see
him shove those things into his mouth each year
at the county fair.
21st year of the County Fair, people who had heard
about Big Dill Pickle came from miles around just
to see him in action. This year, it looked like
no one would challenge him because they knew they
couldn't beat him.
the last minute, a lady named Pinky Pickle, no relation
but some rumored they were first cousins, entered
the contest. She knew she couldn't win. She was
just hungry, loved submarine sandwiches and had
always had a crush on Big Dill Pickle.
of the contest made the announcement. "This
is a contest between Pickles it seems with Big Dill
Pickle on my left, and Pinky Pickle on my right!
Let's get it going!"
Pickle wore his Gold Medallions with pride and with
one hand on a submarine sandwich and the other on
his cane, the starter of the contest shot his pistol
in the air.
Pickle just took her time and was savoring each
bite making sure she chewed and swallowed and enjoyed
each morsel. People standing around just laughed
because they knew who was going to win it.
as Big Dill Pickle was finishing up his first submarine
sandwich, his cane snapped in half and he fell face
down into a big bowl of mayonnaise and couldn't
get back up because of the weight of his medals.
Pickle just kept eating away and was halfway through
her second sandwich when the gun went off signaling
the end of the contest. She won and no one could
believe it! They were all stunned.
of men went over and helped Big Dill Pickle out
of the bowl of mayonnaise and when they wiped it
from his eyes, he was in shock.
never lost before and I don't even like mayonnaise!"
Pickle stayed very calm and cool though and showed
he was tough in the crunch. Plus he didn't want
to be a sour Pickle.
Awarding of the Gold Submarine Sandwich Medallion
Ceremony, Big Dill Pickle, being helped up by several
men, walked to the microphone and said:
before you humble and dazed,
After falling in a bowl of mayonnaise,
I've won this contest for twenty years,
And I lean before you without any tears.
of this gold pulled me down,
And made me look like a silly clown.
But don't be sad for me I declare!
Pinky Pickle won this contest fair and square.
that, she leaned over and kissed him on the cheek
and helped him to his chair. Walking to the microphone,
she wiped a tear from her eye and said:
Pickle is no clown,
Nor should he be wearing any frown.
He gave it his best
But never the less,
The medals he wore brought him down.
applauded and they presented the Gold Medallion
of the Submarine Sandwich to her, which she took
off her neck and placed it around the neck of Big
my hero," she said. "And I think love
tried to stand up, the weight of the medals again
took over and down he went falling face first into
the stage breaking his nose in three different places
making him look like Carl Malden.
that moment on, he only wore the Gold Medallion
Pinky Pickle gave him.
courted for a few months and then were married.
They opened a sandwich shop in the downtown area
and after ten years, had seven kids. There was Spear,
Gherkin, Kosher, Sweet Mix, Half-Sour, Hoagie and
little Baby Dill.
and Pinky Pickle and their seven kids lived happily
ever after. Dill never ate a submarine sandwich
like he did for years at the County Fair because
it was important to teach the kids good eating habits.
By the way, they named the sandwich shop ... Pickles!
It doesn't matter if you win or lose; it only matters
if you stay cool as a cucumber.